Musings from a sub par mom with above par children

Why are there boogers on my pants?

Why are there plastic aliens in my bathtub?

Why are there Legos in the fridge?

Why is there a ball in the laundry basket?

And why are there boogers on my pants??


My Finest Parenting Moment Yet.

Self-proclaimed, yes, but my finest parenting moment yet occurred just before school started.

It was Labor Day weekend, and we enjoyed a perfectly sunny, beautiful Minnesota camping weekend at the lake.  Cousins and family were hanging out, jet-skiing was in full force, trophy fish were caught, and no one had consumed a vegetable for at least 3 days.

The calm before his storm.

Memories had been made.  And I had the pictures to prove it.

And then came time to pack up.

politely requested help carrying all the beach gear back to the camper.  The teenager was eager to help.  The 11 yr old, notsomuch.

In fact, his two-part temper tantrum was so well executed I’ve decided I should get him into acting.  I’ll be rich.

My patience was tested beyond words.  “You’ll be losing a privilege,” I said, “No TV when we get home.”

“GOOD!”, he responded, “I don’t want to watch TV.”

I counted to ten.

I counted to twenty.  Thirty. Forty.   All the way to 87.

Then I remembered some Love and Logic tips, and I remained calm as I said I would be thinking about a second privilege he would be losing.

There was silence as I drove away from the campground thinking about what meant the most to him in life right now.  There were no sleepover invites I could cancel, no football games I could pull him from.

And then it hit me: school started the next day.  Which meant the brand new Nike shoes that he so coveted would be finally worn out in public.

I started to speak: “I’m sorry, but you’ve lost the privilege of wearing your new shoes to school tomorrow.”

His jaw dropped.  And no words came out the entire drive home.

Direct.  Hit.

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